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Spiritual abuse can be confusing. Learn more.
It has been an absolute bright spot to see so many people who understand the heart of Jesus so well, and write toward the hurting to help them heal. They also write toward the powerful to bring them to repentance.
Articles
Here’s a few of the wonderful articles I’ve come across (does not endorse everything written at the host sites):
Reporting Abuse Shouldn’t Be Controversial. It’s Biblical. (thegospelcoalition.org) - on biblical precedent for reporting abuse publicly.
Binding Consciences: Why We Do It, How We Do It, and Why It’s So Dangerous : 9Marks - this is the first article where I saw that something might be wrong in the network. I refer to it regularly.
“Bully Pulpit” Blog Series, by Mike Kruger. This was the series that made me curious enough to read the below books and really figure out what was going on.
It Takes a Village to Escape a Toxic Leader | Christianity Today, by Russell Moore. This captures the phenomenon of Betrayal Blindness better than any other article I’ve read.
When It Comes to Abuse, It Takes a Village (thegospelcoalition.org) — Apparently “village” metaphors are common from this one and the previous by Moore, but they are different articles. This one shows how the rape of Tamar was enabled by everyone around her, functioning in different roles. Useful for those who may be wondering what their responsibility is.
Books
So many fantastic books - the first two are my favorites.
Something’s Not Right, by Wade Mullen. If what I said resonates, but you’re not sure what to make of it, and only read one book, read this one. I’ll buy you a copy if you want it.
A Church Called Tov, by Scot McKnight and Laura Barringer. If you believe nothing I’ve said, this book is still worth your time and money, it’s about how churches can strive to be “Tov” (Hebrew for “Good”) instead of Toxic. It will benefit any church, even great ones. Again, I’m happy to buy copies for people.
If you want more:
Redeeming Power, by Dr. Diane Langberg. Dr. Langberg is an absolute treasure and has been doing trauma therapy for something like 50 years, particularly focused toward religious trauma (hurt by churches).
When Narcissism Comes to Church, by Chuck DeGroat. This book helped me understand that the church pastors and small group leaders can be victims as well as abusers. I have great compassion for the leaders because of this book.
Broken Trust, by F. Remy Deiderich. Solid bite-sized chapters for many topics related to spiritual abuse.
Podcasts
Specific episodes of various podcasts.
Untangled Faith
I can recommend the entire podcast. The most recent season is about her husband’s time at Dave Ramsey’s company (no relation to the Ryan and KJ Ramsey linked here). The prior seasons cover more generic spiritual abuse topics. Some standout episodes:
Interview with Scot McKnight and Laura Barringer
Interview with Wade Mullen Part 1
Interview with Wade Mullen Part 2
The Holy Post
I can mostly recommend the podcast except occasional crude humor. The interviews are exceptional. One standout episode:
Is Your Church Toxic or Tov? with Scot McKnight
Uncertain
A thought-provoking podcast, I can’t say that I agree with all of it, but it’s not afraid of hard questions. This episode is absolute gold, though.
The Church, Abuse of Power, and Jesus with Diane Langberg
The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill Church
Yes, I attended Mars Hill Church in Seattle prior to my time in the network. It was so bad that, despite the issues in the Network, the Network looked quite good by comparison, at least initially. This podcast will hit on some common trends that I see in the Network as well.
YouTube
Diane Langberg - Nothing specifc, but I don’t recall ever listening to anything by her that wasn’t excellent.
Wade Mullen - A condensed version of his book - strongly recommend even before the book.
Probably the fastest way to start learning is to follow these accounts. Note that many of them say things you might not agree with, doctrinally. That’s fine! In the network, I always felt like I needed to agree with everything, but the network doesn’t even agree with everything Grudem says (his views on church governance and discipline, for example). It’s been great to see Christians wrestling with hard questions, even if I don’t share their views.
• Ryan Ramsey: @rramseywrites - read everything he’s written - he’s fantastic - relatively new account, so won’t take long.
• Untangled Faith: @untangledfaith
• Uncertain: @uncertainpodcast
• Jessica Fadel: @ jessicalfadel
• Cait West: @caitwestwrites
• Jenai Auman: @jenaiauman
• KJ Ramsey: @kjramseywrites
• Bruised Faith: @bruised.faith
Diane Langberg - @DianeLangberg. An hour spent reading her recent tweets would be well worth anyone’s time. She’s amazing.
Ryan Ramsey - @rramseywrites (mostly same stuff as on Instagram)
Wade Mullen - @wademullen
Chuck DeGroat - @chuckdegroat
Scot McKnight - @scotmcknight
Laura Barringer - @laurambarringer
Melissa Hogan - @melissajhogan
Amy Fritz - @amyfritz
Me - @HopeOnGrace - disclaimer, likes and follows don’t necessarily imply agreement, sometimes they just mean I appreciated hearing the perspective.